- assassin

- dave chappelle understudy / best friend

- jazz pianist, but 50 or 60 years ago

- go on road trips forever, write about them, sell guidebooks that include itineraries, useful tips, and funny stories about times i almost died, saw a ghost, or when something silly happened.

- invent crazy amazing ice cream flavors with fruits from narnia and science fiction literature

- do problems out of my calculus and organic chemistry books while i listen to really good music on headphones, alone

- ramen* eating (*churros may optionally be eaten following ramen)

- live with wolves in the forest

“If your teeth are chipped or broken can mean many things depending on what events that are happening right now in your life. Broken or chipped dreams imply that something in your life needs more attention before it falls apart. Who was with you in your dream? Where did you notice your teeth being chipped? These are the types of questions you should be asking. Sometimes we experience these dreams when we are trying to fix something that might be broken, like our relationships. Or you might need to repair something that is long over due. If your dream involves somebody breaking your teeth than [sic] that might suggest that somebody is trying to break you down. It is also possible that you might need to keep your mouth shut. If you notice somebody with a chipped tooth suggest that you might feel bad for that person.”

i am not inclined to believe this, but it is nice to know that there are enough people out there dreaming about their teeth chipping or shattering to warrant a webpage attempting to explain such craziness.

link

1. there was some kind of genetic experimentation that led to a friend of mine suddenly transforming into a creature made entirely of tentacles.  the transformation was in a very public place, probably a school or conference.  as my friend tragically changed, he ran through the building and the tentacles would throw any passers-by up in the air or against a wall.

2. i fled the scene, and drove through a post-apocalyptic world that looked like alaska.  a man and a woman were traveling with me, but i did not know them or remember their faces.  we drove down many dirt roads, seeing no one, until we saw two black men standing next to a burning car, waving for us to go around.  not too long after passing them we came upon an abandoned house.  the house was in perfect condition and fully stocked with supplies, and so we began to ransack it.  the last thing i remember is telling my companions that we needed guns, that there must be guns somewhere in the house.

3. i woke up with the erasure song, “a little respect“, stuck in my head.  fabulous.

i was flying over some landscape.  “look, you can see the manatees!” someone yelled.  i peered out the passenger window and saw below various factories and warehouses topped with giant moving manatees, some the size of a bus.  they were made out of polyethylene, or something like it, since they were all entirely translucent white.  they floated like friendly dirigibles or clouds.

my plane progressed further into the city.  we were flying between skyscrapers now.  the plane took sudden turns and banked sharply with no warning or apparent reason.  everyone stayed calm, but inside i felt a bit of concern.  looking out the window i saw structures passing close to the plane, and i wondered if the pilot was either a daredevil or if something was really wrong.  then my eyes were outside of the plane and in my mind i had a first-person view of the plane plummeting rapidly towards the ground.  and then we were all dead.

i woke up within the dream.  i was in a familiar room with a familiar friend.  i sat down at a desk, took out a piece of paper, and began writing.  i was telling my parents what being dead was like.  i think i told them that so far it wasn’t that different from being alive.  but i knew it would be very different, because i could only be in this place for a little while.  i woke up before i had to leave and go to the place where dead people stay forever, whatever that place is.